|Red vs. Blue Episode|
|"Add It Up"|
Sarge, Simmons and Caboose discuss the sixth anniversary of Rooster Teeth Productions. Specifically, Simmons mentions that the community has built a total of a millennium in online time, leading the others to briefly believe the users possess immortality of some kind. After a quick comparison of what the community has done with its time compared to the rest of the world, the three look forward to the future discoveries to be made.
Fade in to Valhalla during rehearsal
Sarge: I just don't feel like in the last few scenes in the show my character has been properly motivated.
Caboose: Uh huh.
Sarge: You know, as a thespian I feel like people need to connect with Sarge's emotional core.
Caboose: I hear that.
Lopez: Sí. Es muy difícil.
Caption: I agree. It can be difficult.
Sarge: Why are you still in character?
Lopez: No mames.
Caption: Don't fuck with my method.
Caboose: I feel you brother.
Simmons: Hey guys, I got the new lines for the birthday PSA.
Caboose: The what?
Simmons: For our sixth anniversary, April first.
Caboose: Really, another birthday? It seems like we just did one last year.
Simmons: We have to do that annual video that says thanks to the people who like us. And to the people who don't like us it says, you know, fuck you we're not going anywhere.
Lopez: Si vamos hacer más líneas, nos vamos a pagar más dinero?
Caption: If we're doing extra lines, does that mean we get overtime?
Simmons: No, and why are you still in character?
Lopez: No voy a decirlo otra vez.
Caption: I'm not going over this again.
Simmons: There is a small problem though. They wanted to connect the PSA to the website, so they had me doing some research.
Caboose: That is a problem.
Simmons: No, I mean- are you still in character too?
Simmons: Hhh, turns out, the website users have built up a total time online of over a millennia.
Sarge: Millennium? You mean our users have been surfing for a thousand years?
Simmons: Yeah, it's pretty crazy, right?
Caboose: Wow, they are really old! Oh my God are they vampires.
Simmons: What? No.
Caboose: Sorry, I get it. Time travelers.
Simmons: Hhh, not individually, a thousand years collectively. And the guys on top want us to celebrate it in some way during the PSA video.
Caboose: Oh, yes, I see, since the users like to eat blood.
Simmons: Not vampires.
Caboose: And since they've probably already been to all the best parties in history-
Simmons: Not time travelers.
Sarge: Okay I got it!
Simmons: Thank God.
Sarge: To celebrate their thousand years online, we hold a big tournament for the users.
Simmons: Sounds good Sir.
Sarge: In which they fight each other to the death with ceremonial swords. Cutting off each other's heads, thus absorbing the immortal powers of their opponents. Winner take all, plus a free T-shirt.
Simmons: Guys, the users are not Highlanders. They got the thousand years as a group. If you add up all the time they spent online, then you get the thousand years.
Sarge: Simmons, I told you no math in our videos.
Simmons: One of the things I thought we could do would be to compare our community's thousand years of accomplishments with the real world's accomplishments in the same timeframe.
Caboose: Sounds great!
Simmons: Eh, not so much. It turns out there's kind of a gap between the two.
A graph appears showing the accomplishments of both timelines
Sarge: How big of a gap?
Simmons: Well, depending on the thousand years of world history you look at, you have anything from the creation of philosophy, or the Pyramids, or more recent stuff like the discovery of flight, or mass communication.
Sarge: What about our guys?
Simmons: Our guys? Well, there's a lot of pictures of cats.
Sarge: Is that it?
Simmons: Some poorly worded motivational posters, some lip-sync videos, and believe me there's a lot of arguments about the origins of the Dharma Initiative.
Caboose: You left out animated gifs. I love those.
Sarge: Nhh, I don't know. It just seems like we could've done more.
Simmons: Well, look at it this way Sir. It only took our users six years to log a millenium of online time. And, since we're growing exponentially, who knows what new discoveries await us?
Caboose: You mean loldogs!
Sarge: Or profiles of hot girls that are actually hot girls.
Caboose: Or BAR forums without scary people.
Simmons: Dare to dream guys... *sniff* dare to dream.
The song "What A Wonderful World" or "Thank You" begins playing