|Red vs. Blue Episode|
|"Long Live the King"|
|Airdate||August 26, 2013|
Long Live the King is the tenth episode of Red vs. Blue: Season 11 and 235th episode overall. It aired on August 26th, 2013.
Sarge and Grif arrive at Blue Base in order to "rescue" Simmons from the Blue team. However, Tucker explains that Simmons voluntarily defected to the Blue team, which enrages Sarge, who brands Simmons as a traitor and prepares to attack him. Tucker begins to yell at the Red team, but Washington tells him to calm down. Tucker, enraged by Washington's strict leadership during their time being stranded, finally snaps and enters a heated argument, claiming that Washington is the worst thing to happen to the Blues since Caboose joined up. Washington retorts by sarcastically stating that if he's so bad, then Caboose should be the leader.
Caboose accepts his "nomination", but Freckles becomes confused and believes that Caboose has actually been promoted to the leader of the Blue team. Simmons is horrified at this and decides to leave, but Freckles threatens to kill him if he attempts to desert the Blue team. Grif informs Sarge that the Blue team is now really kidnapping Simmons, and Sarge responds by attacking Freckles. A gunfight between Sarge and Freckles ensues, and almost escalates into a full blown war between the Reds and Blues, but everyone is interrupted by the sound of a gunshot.
The gunshot is revealed to have been fired by Donut, who reveals that he has arrived along with Doc and the original Lopez, who has once again been reduced to a severed head. The group begins to celebrate, and Washington asks where the rescue ship is. Donut then reveals, much to everyone's shock and horror, that he didn't tip the pilot and simply allowed him to leave with the rescue ship. The group flies into a blind rage and drags Donut and Doc off to beat them up. Atop a nearby cliff, the unknown soldier is seen watching the group through the scope of a sniper rifle. He remarks that the situation is unfortunate before cloaking.
Washington: Look, as long as I'm leader of this team, I will do everything in my power to ensure your safety whether you like it or not.
Tucker: We don't need you protecting us!
Washington: I know! That's why I'm trying to help you.
Tucker: Help us with what? Defending against attack? No one is going to attack us!
Cut to Sarge and Grif in the Warthog driving toward them. Cut to black
Tucker: You have literally the worst timing.
Sarge: Stow it, thin mint. We're no longer fraternizing with the enemy.
Tucker: "Thin mint"?
Grif: Now see, when he says "we" imagine he's only referring to himself. Do not group us together.
Tucker: Bitch, my armor's aqua! I think.
Washington: What the hell are you two doing?
Grif: Uh, again, not "two," just him. I can't stress this enough.
Sarge: You made me believe that Reds and Blues can coexist, and we can work together as one people, and that we can all get together and be...a little...purple.
Washington: We can! We are! Seriously, what the fuck is this about?
Sarge: You kidnapped one of my men!
Simmons: Who? Me?
Tucker: He wasn't kidnapped, dipshit, he came over here by himself! We can't get him to leave.
Sarge: Is this true, Simmons?
Simmons: It's not your fault, sir. It's Grif's.
Grif: What did I do?
Simmons: You're fucking disgusting, Grif!
Grif: Well, yeah. But I've always been like that. Sarge was the one that decided to take half the base for himself.
Simmons: Oh. Then I guess it is your fault, sir.
Sarge: Then that makes you a traitor!
Freckles: Threat level increased.
Caboose: Uh, yeah, no reason for panic. Everything's fine. Might anyone have a rolled up newspaper at the ready?
Sarge: You weren't kidnapped! You deliberately joined the enemy!
Tucker: But if he wasn't kidnapped, that would mean we were never the enemy in the first place!
Sarge: Don't try to confuse me with your words, shamrock!
Tucker: I'm aqua!
Washington: Tucker, calm down.
Tucker: Me? These guys roll up in a fucking assault jeep and you choose to yell at me?
Washington: Look, tensions are high-
Tucker: No shit, Washington. I'm tired of you bossing us around.
Washington: Now is not the time.
Tucker: You know, I disagree. We were having a talk when Tweedledee and Tweedle-fucking-idiot decided to interrupt, so let's finish this.
Washington: There is nothing to finish!
Grif: Are we intruding on some sort of lovers' quarrel right now?
Tucker: You are the worst thing to happen to this team since blue-boy over there decided to show up.
Caboose: I am a man! Blue man!
Simmons: You take that back. Wash is a great leader. I assume.
Freckles: Deadly force authorized.
Tucker: Seriously, I would rather follow Caboose into battle than you.
Washington: Oh, really? Then let's just make him the leader, see how much better off you are!
Caboose: Well, I humbly accept your nomination and accept the position.
Washington and Tucker: Shut up!
Freckles: Do not talk back to your commanding officer.
Tucker: Wash and I are having an argument. I will be talking back to him. That's how arguments work, you fucking toaster.
Camera shifts to Freckles' POV through his HUD's screen. The word "DEMOTED" appears over Washington as Freckles looks at him
Freckles: Washington is not the commanding officer.
Freckles: In a unanimous decision by the Blue Team, Caboose has been promoted to Blue leader. Captain Caboose is now your commanding officer. Do not talk back to your commanding officer.
Grif: Oh, fuck.
Caboose: Well, yep. This is gonna be a lot of fun.
Washington: No, Caboose, you can't-
Freckles turns toward Washington
Washington: Look, Freckles, this is a misunderstanding!
Simmons: Caboose is team leader? Fuck this.
Caboose: Augh, don't worry, Simmons. As my first duty as leader in the position of the nomination, I say you can be on Blue Team...forever!
Simmons begins to walk away from the Blues
Simmons: No thanks, I'm good.
Freckles: Private Simmons.
Simmons: Oh no.
Freckles: Deserting your post will designate you as AWOL. This designation is punishable by death.
Grif: Uh, hey Sarge? Now the Blues have kidnapped Simmons.
Sarge: THEN IT'S WAR!
Washington: Wait! Stop!
Sarge activates the cannon on the Warthog
Sarge: Say hello to robot Satan, you mechanical son of a bi-
Grif throws himself out of the Warthog just as Freckles shoots it, sending both Grif and Sarge flying out of the blown up vehicle
Caboose: Freckles! Bad! Bad! No!
Freckles: Primary threat eliminated.
Lopez 2.0 runs into the area at the sound of explosions
Lopez 2.0: ¿Cual fue esa explosió—MIERDA. ¿QUÉ HAS HECHO?[What was the explos—HOLY SHIT. WHAT DID YOU DO?]
Simmons: Sarge! Are you okay?
Sarge: (grunts in pain) No, Simmons. I'm afraid I won't be okay...until I exact my revenge!
Grif: Seriously, I am not affiliated with this lunatic. He does not speak for me.
Sarge charges toward Freckles
Freckles: Engaging target.
Caboose: Freckles, no!
Washington: Sarge, don't!
Cut to a gun being shot into the air. Both teams slowly turn toward the source of the sound
Donut: Man, you guys are really noisy.
A pause, before both teams (minus Caboose) run toward Donut. Indistinct cheering
Donut: Aww! You must have really missed me!
Grif: Donut, thank God you're here!
Sarge: We were just about ready to kill each other.
Tucker: Speak for yourself.
Washington: Where's the ship?
Donut: What ship?
Washington: The ship you came here on. The rescue team.
Donut: Ohhhh. Hah-hah, duh! Allow me to introduce: the rescue team!
Camera pans to the right to show Doc standing a little ways off
Washington: Wait. What is this?
Doc: Donut told me you guys needed help.
Donut: So I got the best help money could buy!
Doc: You didn't pay me.
Donut: And I didn't tip the pilot! That's formality.
Sarge: What pilot?
Donut: The pilot that dropped us off, dummy.
Tucker: "Dropped you off"?
Grif: As in, he's not here anymore?
Caboose runs over to join the group
Washington: So you're telling me...that you heard our distress signal...grabbed Doc...hopped on a ship...and then TOLD THE SHIP TO LEAVE? AND THAT'S YOUR IDEA OF SENDING HELP?!
Donut: What? No! I brought Lopez, too!
Camera cuts to Lopez 2.0 standing next to Lopez's disembodied head
Lopez: Qué. Carajo.[What. The fuck.]
Sarge: Kill him!
The Reds and Blues converge on Doc and Donut and drag them behind a rock. The sounds of punching and beating commence. Indistinct angry yelling can be heard
Donut: Someone get this maniac turquoise guy away from me!
Tucker: I'M AQUA!
Cut to Locus on an outcrop watching the group from afar through the scope on his sniper rifle
Locus: Huh. Unfortunate.
Locus then proceeds to activate some form of cloaking device
- The tradition of a reveal during the tenth episode is continued here, though rather than Tex, it reveals the arrival of Donut, Doc, and Lopez on Chorus. In reference to the tradition usually being Tex, the song A Girl Named Tex is heard playing before Donut's reveal.
- Lopez is revealed to now be reactivated since Recreation, although he is seen as a head, a reference to his appearance in the Blood Gulch Chronicles.
- Tucker is shown to be unsure of what color his armor is, a reference to Out of Body.
- When Donut fires his pistol and walks forward, Tex's theme plays, a reference to her making appearances in the tenth episode of several seasons.
- Lopez 2.0's armor legs, forearms, and shoulders all change to Mark VI, similar to the rest of the Reds and Blues.
- Sarge's line "You made me believe that Reds and Blues can coexist, and we can work together as one people, and that we can all get together and be... a little... purple." is actually a reference to a lyric from a deleted opening theme song that was originally supposed to be used for the second episode of the first season, made by Rooster Teeth. It was sung solely by Burnie Burns and ends with laughter for its absurdity all of which is Burnie laughing with different pitches for each track.
- Caboose's statement of using a rolled up newspaper may be a reference to Fourth and Twenty, where he makes a similar remark to the Religious Aliens.
- The title of the episode is a reference to the traditional proclamation made following of a new monarch after the previous. This relates to Caboose being promoted to leader of Blue Team, as Washington was the "king" of the Blues but lost his "kingship" to Caboose when he's elected.
- The "Son of a-" gag returns in this episode, spoken by Sarge before the warthog is destroyed.