|Red vs. Blue Episode|
|"MIA: Episode 5"|
|Airdate||December 10, 2011|
MIA: Episode 5 is the fifth episode of the mini-series Red vs. Blue: MIA and the 198th episode overall.
Inside the Battle Creek base, Church, Tucker, and Caboose search and find the Blue Grunt soldiers, who believe the three are new recruits. Church corrects them and asks for directions to the city. The Grunt leader converses with a fellow comrade, who both seem unsure about Tucker & Church in particular. They say the two are "off-blue" and could possibly be Reds in disguise. To be completely sure about their visitors, the Grunt leader asks for the Blue leader to step forward. Caboose & Tucker immediately glance at Church, who reluctantly to steps forward. Church is asked by the Grunt leader to recite the Blue Team password. Unsure of what the password is, Church makes a wild guess and says "Blue", which is revealed to be correct.
Outside, the group explain their situation to the Blue Grunt leader by showing him the ransom letter. However, the Grunt leader is unable to read the letter, due to the letter's terrible handwriting. Desperate, Sarge asks him if he knows the way to the city, but the Grunt leader is still a bit reluctant about helping "Reds". A Red Grunt suddenly appears from behind a rock, but is quickly killed.
Tucker tells the Grunt leader that the Reds are cool, to which Simmons misinterprets his meaning. The Grunt leader then updates the group's GPS and gladly says goodbye to Tucker, Church, & Caboose; but, in return, tells Sarge & Simmons to never come back.
Finally making it to the city, the group splits up. Church tells Sarge, Simmons, and Tucker to find the information guy, while Caboose and him go to the store and look for supplies. Caboose becomes very annoyed at the fact at going shopping, until Church tells him that he will buy him a toy, changing his mood.
Open to the Blues searching the Battle Creek base
Church: Okay, Sarge said these guys can be a little, uh... Fanatical.
Tucker: Hey Caboose? Didn't you meet these guys before?
Caboose: It's hard to say. I meet so many people. I'm very popular.
Blue Grunt Leader: Halt! Who's there?
Church: Uh, hey. Hi, uh, we're just some Blue guys, trying to get some direction-
A group of blue grunts are seen jumping in the background
Blue Grunt Leader: New recruits!
All Grunts: Kill the Reds! Kill the Reds! Kill the Reds!
Church: No no no, no, no. Not new recruits, just Blue guys. Like you.
Tucker: Well, better than you guys, though.
Church: Okay, okay. Yes, yes, well, sure, okay, but still Blue, and therefore, you know, not-shootable.
Blue Grunt Leader: Hmmm. What do you think, Blue soldier?
Blue Grunt: It could be an evil Red plot, sir. (Looking at Caboose) that one looks okay, but those two (looks at Tucker and Church) look a little un-blue.
Blue Grunt Leader: Would you say "non-blue"?
Blue Grunt: Off-blue.
Blue Grunt Leader: Disgusting! Maybe they're sick.
Blue Grunt: Or maybe, they're Reds in disguise.
Blue Grunt Leader: Only one way to make sure. (To Church, Caboose, and Tucker) I need your leader to step forward.
Church: (To Caboose and Tucker) Why are you guys looking at me?
Tucker: You're the leader.
Church: You know, we don't technically have an assigned leader.
Tucker: Oh, you're gonna pull that now? Dude, you always want to be leader!
Church: Well somebody has to be.
Tucker: Yeah, especially right now in this room full of idiots with guns.
Church: Fine. (Grunts and steps forward) Hello, I am the leader.
Blue Grunt Leader: Fellow Blue, if you are who you say you are then surely you will know the Blue team password. If you know it, you are welcome here, if not, then you are not. And also, we will kill you, because of the not being welcome thing.
Tucker: Man, I am so glad right now that I have absolutely no ambition.
Blue Grunt Leader: Yes! The Blue team password, which every Blue learns when he sets foot on the path to Blueness, and once achieving full Blue-bility, the Blue carries a word with him whenever the Blue way of life is threatened. What is the Blue password?
Church: Ummm... Is it Blue?
Blue Grunt Leader: Okay, yeah, they check out.
Cut to the Reds, Blues, and the Blue Grunt Leader standing in a small field
Sarge: See, we need to get to the city to find out where out soldier is being held.
Simmons: The kidnapper left this note. (Lays the note on the ground)
Blue Grunt Leader: Ahhhhhh.
Church: You see something there?
Blue Grunt Leader: Yes! The man you are looking for has terrible handwriting.
Simmons: That's not. . . (sighs) never mind.
Sarge: Can you tell us which way to the city?
Blue Grunt Leader: I don't know. I don't really like the idea of helping Reds.
A Red grunt pops up from behind a rock
Red Grunt: Did somebody say Red team? Yeah! Red team all the way! Suck it -
Blue Grunt Leader shoots the Red Grunt in the head, knocking him to the ground
Red Grunt: I can see the light. And it's a red light!
Blue Grunt Leader grunts
Tucker: We told you, these guys are cool.
Blue Grunt Leader: You sure?
Simmons: You really think we're cool?
Tucker: Okay, well maybe 'cool' was the wrong word.
Simmons: No takebacks!
Blue Grunt Leader: Okay, we updated your GPS, it was good to see you guys. (Looks at Sarge and Simmons) You two, never come back.
Sarge: Hot-diggity done!
Cut to the Reds and Blues standing on a street in the city
Simmons: Ah. finally, we're here.
Church: Cool. Okay, you guys go find Tucker's kidnap guy-
Tucker: Information guy.
Church: I'm gonna grab Caboose and go get some supplies that we can't get in the canyon.
Simmons: Like what?
Church: Like, everything, the canyon doesn't have crap.
Simmons: Good point.
Sarge: Hey Blue, would you mind pickin' us up a few things?
Church: Why? What's the point of that? We're just gonna take it all back the moment we help you find Grif.
Sarge: Maybe we'll just wait a few days, stock up then.
Church: Yeah, good idea. Come on Caboose.
Caboose: Where are we going?
Church: Weren't you listening?
Caboose: Nope, sorry. These buildings are really tall and that's distracting for some people.
Tucker: Yeah, for you.
Caboose: I'm people.
Church: Just forget it. We're going shopping.Okay? (Walks away)
Caboose: Ah, shopping? Ah, God, I hate shopping! Ah, it's so boring, and I have to try on pants...
Fade to black
Church: Come on, I'll buy you a toy.
Caboose: An ice cream-toy?
Church: Don't push your luck.