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Red vs. Blue Episode
"Tax Day Tips"
Tax days tips
Episode no. Unknown
Airdate Unknown
Running time 2:06

Red vs. Blue Season 2
January 3, 2004 - July 11, 2004

  1. Everything Old is New Again
  2. Motion to Adjourn
  3. Red vs. Bleu
  4. The Joy of Toggling
  5. Sweet Ride
  6. Last Words
  7. Nobody Likes You
  8. Nine Tenths of the Law
  9. In Stereo Where Available
  10. Radar Love
  11. I Dream of Meanie
  12. Room for Rent
  13. Me, Myself and You
  14. An Audience of Dumb
  15. Aftermath, Before Biology
  16. What's Mine is Yours
  17. Nut. Doonut.
  18. Dealer Incentive
  19. K.I.T. B.F.F.

Tax Day Tips is a PSA of Red vs. Blue that involves Sarge, Tucker, and Doc discussing taxes.

CharactersEdit

Red TeamEdit

Blue TeamEdit

OtherEdit

SynopsisEdit

Tucker comes across Sarge, who is upset after learning he is in millions of dollars of tax debt to the Internal Revenue Service. Doc attempts to offer advice, but ends up getting shot at when he suggests deducting weapons and vehicles, claiming they actually have to use them first.

TranscriptEdit

Fade to Sarge and Tucker with sad music behind.

Sarge: Boo hoo hoo, boo hoo hooo!

Tucker: Hey Sarge, what are you so sad about? Did Church eat the last of the fried chittlins again?

Sarge: Oh, it's not that... delicious intestinal delicacies. I just finished doing my taxes and I owe the government 18,675,962 dollars and 43 cents!

Tucker: Whoa! That's worse than getting personally ass violated by the entire Internal Revenue Service.

Sarge: Tell me about it. Oh, whatever will I do?

Doc coming out from the back.

Doc: Maybe you should try itemizing your deductions.

Sarge:  Itemizing my how-now?

Tucker: What?! That sounds like hocus-pocus mumbo-jumbo funny talk if you ask me. What kind of numbers game are you running, chump change DuFresne?

Doc: It's a real thing! Honest! Sarge, let's take you for starters. What did you put in your tax return as your occupation?

Sarge: Well, loud singer of course.

Doc: Hmmm... maybe we should start with you Tucker. What was your job?

Tucker: Technically, it was pimp. But I like to class it up and list it as "Whore supervisor".

Doc: OK... Well, let's just say for instance, that you both worked in the military. If you bought anything related to your job that the military didn't pay you back for, you can deduct that expense from your earnings; thus lowering your income tax burden.

Sarge: Hmm, I seem to remember buying this shotgun on my own dime, as well as the bullets!

Tucker: Yeah! And I'm pretty sure I paid for this assault rifle myself too. Where is that receipt?

Doc: Ha ha! Well, technically guys, if you want to deduct those expenses, you really need to use those items at work.

Sarge and Tucker reload their guns and open fire on Doc.

Doc: What the... Hey! I was only trying to help!

Tucker: Deduct this, tax boy!

Doc: Oooh! That stings!

Tucker: Hey Sarge! We almost forgot about gas and mileage deduction on our cars.

Sarge: I'll get the Warthog and run over him.

Tucker: I'll get Sheila.

Doc: You guys are so gonna get audited. It's not even funny!

VideoEdit

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